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»  And your Sacred Stars won't be Guiding you, Tag: Birdy
Roberta Buck
 Posted: May 4 2014, 02:32 AM
Quote


Traditional Dreamspeaker
35, Enlightened

N/A


Birdy was so caught up in her spirit communication that she didn't really register what Lazarus had said. Instead, she was trying to coax the bird spirit into returning with whatever shoes she had stashed in its nest. She saw the change appear in the man's hand and her eyes lit up as she reached for the shiniest pair. A quarter and a nickel, both bright and new. In her hand they glinted and once again she reached up to the sky. This time, the magpie swooped down and scooped up the change before flying off again.

The bargain struck, Birdy turned to Lazarus and dusted off her hands. "Right. Yes... that?? Shoes. I told you I'd do something about them." She hopped down off the stoop then, scooping up her neatly folded blanket before she turned to join Lazarus in escaping the alley. ".. and I heard that Disney Princess thing... completely unfounded." Precisely then, because the universe was a Mean Girl there was a clatter behind them on the pavement. For a heartbeat Birdy did not want to look behind her, but she also didn't want to wander the streets of New York barefooted. With a soft sigh, she turned to look down at the shoes lying on the ground and the magpie hopping possessively around them. As Birdy retreated to pick them up the bird flew away, perching in the eaves to sing its borrowed song; more barking dogs and what sounded like cabbies yelling. The shoes were lovely, gladiators with a moderate heel, all over gold with straps up her ankles. They were the kind of shoe that made you feel pretty and moderately dangerous. Her girlish heart giggled and she slipped her feet into them and started lacing.

A mere minute and several inches later, Birdy righted herself with a toss of her hair and a straightening of her shoulders as she released the blanket from where she'd clamped it between her knees to secure her shoes. Really, the entirety of the maneuver was impressive and on par with taking your bra off without taking off your shirt; her smile showed off just how pleased she was as she sauntered back to Lazarus' side. "Now then, we were just talking about where to go... I'm not completely familiar with the neighborhood. Have any recommendations? Oh. Or we could just walk and you could tell me everything. Walking is conducive to storytelling."
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Lazarus Fenwick
 Posted: May 4 2014, 11:29 PM
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Tremere Eccentric
40, Kindred

N/A


Lazarus nodded, returning his handful of change back into his pocket as he smiled-because he got it after a little while, but it was much more entertaining as she seemed to deny his statement about singing a happy working song as a bird returned with her shoes as if by cue. "Oh well then...completely unfounded." The vampire snickered at her expense without much concern because well, it was funny- polite or no, and he had just called him a maiden so turnabout was fair play by this point.

"Bird has taste."

He commented gesturing at the dropped sandals, an idle observation as many of his were, but then again Lazarus was never a man with much to talk about he had always lived a secretive life where it was best to be seen and not heard. Make him heard and well...goodness he felt terribly dull. Then again, that was possibly because he was just terribly dull, he couldn't rule that one out. He stepped out of the alley and allowed Roberta to situate herself as she had to, besides she rejoined him soon enough. "Well there are a few coffee shops in the area, though I never had much of a taste for the stuff." Less so now given the state of his dead digestive tract, but with the second option he seemed to tilt his chin in approval.

"It is a safe neighborhood for walking." For talking who knew, he wasn't accustomed to talking about himself any and over the last five years he had almost stopped talking to anyone at all. So there was a bit of a hitch in his throat, his adam's apple bobbed, like he couldn't quite get over that hump of being an awkward sort of man. "You ask for everything...and there really isn't anything." He pointed out almost trying to sound diplomatic in his quiet little way, because he just simply did not understand what she wanted.

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Roberta Buck
 Posted: May 5 2014, 11:09 PM
Quote


Traditional Dreamspeaker
35, Enlightened

N/A


What was she supposed to say? The spirits, clearly, agreed with Lazarus and argument would only make it worse. Birdy knew when she was beat. ...and she had called him a maiden. Ok, so that was true but the metaphor stood. He was the one with the rare and lovely (currently rabid and twisted with some twisted vendetta) unicorn as an avatar. Her own soul's reflection was neither so pristine nor delicate. Raven could only laugh.

When he pointed out the bird's taste, Birdy preened a bit and wiggled her toes in them. "Thank you. I like to think I do well for myself when I try." She was the one that had placed the shoes thank you very much. "Now then... coffee we can pass on but you're lying almost entirely to say there isn't anything to tell. You've existed up to this point, haven't you? You were a child?" She smiled reassuringly and patted his arm. They were a handsome pair to be out strolling in the night. Strange, but pleasant to look at from the outside. "You could tell me about other... milestones. " How else did she come out and say, 'How did you end up like this??' Birdy supposed she could just ask, just like that but he didn't seem like the most open of individuals and she didn't want to scare him away.

And so, as if he was a skittish pony she kept her voice soothing and her motions slow and relaxed. "You tell me something and I'll tell you something. Anything you'd like."
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Lazarus Fenwick
 Posted: May 6 2014, 12:54 AM
Quote


Tremere Eccentric
40, Kindred

N/A


"I was complimenting the bird."

A touch of sass, he glanced down at Roberta with a coy smirk. He was more then the sum of his innocent avatar, something that had left him ages ago...but then again, unicorns were known for their fickle vengeful natures. "Of course I was a child. I was a boring child who hid in the shadows of his two older brothers." That he had somehow outshone by the time he hit adulthood, but that was neither here nor there, because while he had been close to them in youth that simple fact had estranged him from them by the time he had grown old.

Something of a matter that still filled him with sadness, he and his oldest brother had one been thick as thieves. Yet they hadn't spoken more then in passing in years. Lazarus was not a man who was good at hiding personal pain, he could mask emotions in a courtroom like a poker player, but when it all hit too close to home his face fell. "Sort of a boring adult as well." He admitted, his situation was no different then hundreds upon thousand of men in this day in age- except that he was a walking corpse.

Though he knew that condition was the curiosity, though she was looking for symptoms rather then the cause. Which in a sense he was already starting to give away piece by piece to someone who could put the puzzle together. "I'm not being terribly cooperative, though if you feel you want to give me some tit for tat...so be it." He hummed, eyes lifting up to look at the brightened night sky, "I was the first of my siblings to reach the end of the Golden Path...young even. I hated it." He didn't say awaken...well maybe he shouldn't even the way he said it was treacherous, but since they were talking and this girl did summon a bird. What harm was there with a touch of betrayal?
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Roberta Buck
 Posted: May 6 2014, 12:50 PM
Quote


Traditional Dreamspeaker
35, Enlightened

N/A


“The bird is the word and I am the word. So the bird is me.” It was a little bit of roundaboutation but it was the truth. “Besides, magpies boast quite enough without you encouraging them.” The pace was comfortable, long legs and strides matched well enough that it made the walking thoughtless. It gave Birdy a chance to study the man she was walking with as if she was piecing together a puzzle that she didn't have a guiding image for. She would have to just see what came of it.

“Your gift for understatement is… exceptional.” She smiled and gave his arm a squeeze. Doing so reminded her of how cold he was, how lacking that human, radiating warmth and it made her falter a moment. She didn't pull away long though, only for enough time to drape her blanket over her shoulders (Raven side in). Once it hung as it usually did, warming and comforting her, she retook Lazarus’ arm and rather than long for human warmth she rather hoped some of her own would seep into his bones as a pleasant memory.

“But tit for tat…. I was also a precocious child. It made school…. Interesting. Somewhat difficult at times. I could always find someone to talk to.” Even now the spirits were thick around her. They were drawn to her voice – her manner. They knew she would listen and speak for them. Her reputation in the city among those that weren't quite solid was increasing. “But I was lucky, my grandmother helped me a lot. Taught me bunches until I was old enough for real lessons and tutoring. She was with me from the time I learned to walk until …. Well… until I moved here. But we still talk though, just not as much. Why did you hate it so much? You didn't like the quiet, clever feeling that you were special? You weren't… you didn't feel like you could change the world some day?”
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Lazarus Fenwick
 Posted: May 8 2014, 12:37 AM
Quote


Tremere Eccentric
40, Kindred

N/A


"Mmm hmm."

Lazarus quirked a brow, but had nothing much to say about magpies and egos, though he had his own and it was showing just a little bit. Playful in a dull little way, then again, he was the one being observed and it was enough to make him a little mindful and while not outright annoyed he was doing his own version of acting out. "Hyperbole is it's own reward." Underestimation got him through the worst of things, when people expected little he was the one that benefited, so he had grown a knack for deflection over the years. The most important thing a young Quesadori could learn growing up.

That squeeze though and subsequent adjustment of a blanket did however make him self aware and self conscious all at once. He knew he was a cold, dead thing, though he didn't always think about it. The corner of his lip jerked for just a second, a muted reaction of almost disgust as he pulled it up into a smile to turn it around before the expression could be considered an insult.

"You? A precocious child? Perish the thought." He teased lightly, because as it was, this near stranger had proven herself quite the precocious adult. "Though good on your grandmother, there are too many orphans this day and age...too many old guard who are too wrapped up in their own hubris to take them on." He shook his head, knowing well enough that it was a trap that even some of his own siblings had fallen into...and look where they were now. It was a great regret that he hadn't been able to curb any of that, but then again, he had only been an apprentice himself at the time. Stupid pointless regrets that meant nothing.

Which was probably why the former Hermetic frowned as he was asked why he hated it all so much. "I didn't like how my siblings turned on me when I did, because I would have rather been normal with them then have been the first one to earn our father's approval." He pointed it out plainly, and followed such a serious statement with a dark chuckle. "What good it did me. What good any of us do for the world..."

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Roberta Buck
 Posted: May 10 2014, 12:59 PM
Quote


Traditional Dreamspeaker
35, Enlightened

N/A


Birdy nodded along, that birdlike bob of agreement as they walked. She was enjoying the conversation as careful and stilted as it was. Ah well. She appreciated his veiled compliment and gave his arm a gentle squeeze, as she shrugged it off modestly.

“My grandmother was never one of the old guard. My grandfather though – he was. And there have always been... in his family. But after... my grandmother passed, I mean... she was always very spirited.” Her eyes twinkled at the thought, the old woman would appreciate the pun. “And as such, she was... you know.. one of the gang. Since she was, it made teaching me much easier. Maybe that's why I'm ok with it, I never really had a chance to be normal.” Shaman were initiated and then sought spirit approval in a much more arduous rite. Birdy had never had that, she had been their confidant for so long she never knew any other way. Walking in the spirit world was second nature to her. That said though, she turned her attention right back to Lazarus.

“Well I'm sorry your siblings were difficult but... aren't kids always difficult?” Birdy was starting to draw some very particular conclusions about how well she would NOT get along with the elder Mr Fenwick. They were only assumptions though at that point, she could be entirely wrong about the man but to judge by the sardonic reaction and his son's willingness to give up his life for this... Eh. She stopped herself. It was for her to learn more, to gather information, not to make assumptions blindly. “You are still a part of the world Lazarus. Simply in a different... rotation. Recycle, Reduce, Reuse.” It seemed trite and she didn't want him to be entirely insulted, she did not think of him as refuse. “I know, I know its a little bit Left Coast but that is me to the bone. What about you? Hmm? Or your siblings? Or do you not keep in touch with them??” She really just wanted him to keep talking while she puzzled the whole thing through.
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Lazarus Fenwick
 Posted: May 11 2014, 02:03 AM
Quote


Tremere Eccentric
40, Kindred

N/A


Lazarus nodded politely, showing that he was listening to the story- because he was quite intently though his attention was still not exactly on Roberta, it was more as though he was screening for some threat he was waiting for. Guarding them both it would seem.

Though after a moment or two he blinked and turned his attention away from his weary eyeing of where buildings met pavement to the person he was holding a conversation with. "I doubt that any of us really had a chance to be 'normal' by dint of our breeding...even if we had never awakened, it has a way of sticking to someone." There were several acolytes he knew that had enlightened parents or grandparents...and any other odd family members and it had changed them. Whether they had wanted to or not.

"They aren't particularly any more or less difficult then you'd expect given the circumstances, just like I said. It sticks." He shrugged, not really concerned about what had transpired other then it had happened once, terrible for certain though nothing that could have been changed. Much like his place in the world now. "I am inert. Outside of the natural order. Don't act like you haven't seen it, didn't feel it...I saw it on your face the moment you touched me, and I assume you tried to read my soul. What did you see then Ms Roberta? Did it frighten or just disgust you?" His tone wasn't challenging given the softness it bore, but there was little doubt he was daring the mage to speak in truth. Even if she had difficulties doing so since they had met. He huffed a little then and shook his head, flipping his white hair and putting it back in place. "What about me? What about them? We see each other on Christmas sometimes, and I never speak to them, and they rarely speak to me..." the vampire smirked.

"I very rarely leave my room you see. Makes things easier to explain. Safer."
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Roberta Buck
 Posted: May 12 2014, 02:46 AM
Quote


Traditional Dreamspeaker
35, Enlightened

N/A


Bridy strolled without fear. Certainly, there were a great many things in the city a girl should worry about but at the moment she was safely attached to the undead..... who was going to mess with her now? Honestly though, fear hadn't quite reached her conscious mind, at least not in that regard. Instead she was preparing to answer him on the subject of how one's avatar sort of stuck to them when he got to the much uglier question. It saddened her to hear how resigned he was to it, how much of it seemed to wash over him instead of catching on the crags and peaks that made up a human's will. Where was the resistance? Is that what he'd given up, but what for?

"Hmph. Honestly? Disappointed." She stopped and stood there, turning to properly face him as she spoke. She was prepared for him to pull away but it wasn't going to keep her from talking. "I am.... disappointed and confused. You say you're inert and outside the order but... for what? Look at what you've given up to be here. Couldn't you at least... act like it was worth it?" The moment the words tumbled from her lips she regretted the harshness of them. But there was no going back, they'd been spoken. "And I didn't need to try to read your soul. I've seen it. Or rather, the part of it that's left - that was torn away. And it thought well enough of you to stick around and not try to find someone else. Well enough to be striking out for revenge. If you could see it... its... its an angry thing Lazarus, a sad thing to see a unicorn hurting and destructive like that. Its turned itself inside out because of you. Be worth it."
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Lazarus Fenwick
 Posted: May 12 2014, 03:32 AM
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Tremere Eccentric
40, Kindred

N/A


"Aren't we all?"

Disappointment was nothing new for Lazarus, both personally and being something he garnered from others. His face grew softer and he shook his head, not really understanding what Roberta was getting at, because as far as paradigm went it seemed the two of them would have been diametrically opposed back when he was a more lively man. "Of course I have. Do you even know what I am? I am now one of the greatest traitors that the Traditions had ever known. Loathed more then barrabi in some circles. Hunted by some to the ends of the earth." Harshness met with quiet ferocity. He finally pulled his arm away and held his hands out as though making a cutting motion in the air. "I was a man once now I am a soulless monster."

Day by day he could feel his humanity slipping, and even the Dreamspeaker had felt that there was an incompleteness there. He felt it himself every night an empty pain that couldn't be filled and yet every night it got easier and easier to ignore. Like a conscience. "That thing is no longer a part of me. I released it before it could die. It should have moved on." Lazarus mulled around that last sentence silently against his lips a second time before shaking his head. "There's nothing I can do for it, perform a sending, tell it to leave...banish it from the near umbra or jam it into an infant...it's somebody else's now." He waved his hands wildly for a moment and then finally folded his arms against his chest with a huff before that cold calm came over him once again.

"It was worth it to me, and I did what I could to save it...but we both know that I'm worth nothing to it now."
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Roberta Buck
 Posted: May 13 2014, 12:04 AM
Quote


Traditional Dreamspeaker
35, Enlightened

N/A


As Lazarus shifted and pulled himself away from her, Birdy wavered slightly. She didn't want him to feel cornered but letting him back away was just as bad an idea. Rather than put herself closer, she reached out for his hand, holding his long fingers carefully in both of her hands. There was no pulse, no beat of life in them. Just the cold, slightly plastic feel of the dead. Her heart sank down into her stomach further and she steeled herself to prevent the tears. "Oh stop. If you were a monster, why would you even be talking to me? You could have had me half drained and abandoned in an alley. If you were a monster - you never would have tried to spare it... but you did."

She cleared her throat slightly, Birdy drew herself up a little further and again, tried to become more resolute. "You have to understand, the natural inclination is to move on. Its not a simple spirit that is so mired in its ways that it cannot see the path before it. " As she spoke, her voice got softer but more hurried. While her vocabulary choice became less vague, her tone became more protective and evasive. "It is your avatar- if it won't leave you to go back to the cycle clearly it thinks it is not done with you. It has decided your life and existence are worth giving up so much potential, so many times over. And here you stand bemoaning the disappointment of life and the sadness of your existence. Is that really, really how you want to use whatever time it is that you have left? If you feel yourself slipping away, before you're gone shouldn't you -do- something?"

Birdy was pleading with him, whether for herself and her fear of failure or the unicorn she'd watched as it plunged deeper into the darkness it should have been fighting. She was wrong to say she wasn't mad -- she was angry but it hurt more than she expected. Nothing at all was owed to the man, Birdy had no attachment to him specifically so why not just walk away? Maybe that was the right answer.
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Lazarus Fenwick
 Posted: May 13 2014, 12:41 AM
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Tremere Eccentric
40, Kindred

N/A


Those warm fingers twining with his caught his attention, Lazarus paused, looking somewhat between shocked and maybe just a little offended. "Because you aren't a member of the Order." Because if you had asked him maybe ten years ago he would have called any Dreamspeaker a bleeding heart hippy, but right now it was working to advantage. "And we both know ten, fifteen maybe even five years from now, it won't be the same. You do know about vampires don't you? It's a slow process...they start out human as any of us, but over time it gets lost." He had read about it in many books as a kid, scary stories that had been fascinating back then, but in hindsight were now terrifying.

"Immortality is not moving on. I have become status incarnate, a static thing. Which is and of itself against the natural order. Something that does not and will not die a natural death." He understood what and where she was going with this. He honestly did. But there wasn't honestly a member of the Traditions that would have argued with him knowing what he was and not trying to get something. Roberta was after something. That was apparent since this all began.

The vampire shrugged "Besides, I can't do anything." Lazarus held up a hand "I can't do any real magick now that my avatar is gone. With it, went my power and any chance I might have to re-do the ritual that I attempted back during my ghoul days. I wasn't dead then, so maybe it's simply confused." Truly he was offering what he could to fix what was obviously a mistake he had made, the ritual must have failed, and now...well, now someone else would have to fix it. "You know how this works..."

He was pleading also, a great guilty and angry thing that wasn't angry at the girl beside him but more tearing himself inside because he was unable to do anything but stand aside for this. At least he could think of no better option but speak of reason. "It's not for any lack of want or trying, I understand your frustration. It has been my own for years. I assure you." If at that point she wanted to run off in a huff, he couldn't blame her, he would have done the same, though he was honestly not trying to be difficult, it was simply that things were difficult. This new state had a way of complicating things.

"I just don't know what to do anymore."
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Roberta Buck
 Posted: May 13 2014, 07:42 PM
Quote


Traditional Dreamspeaker
35, Enlightened

N/A


Birdy listened to the man as he spoke, she let him talk as she ran his words over and over in her mind. He hadn't yet taken his hand out of her grasp and as he continued to speak the question she’d asked herself was answered. The woman shaman turned the hand over, so she could inspect his palm. As he spoke of what he couldn't do and how he was frustrated she traced the middle of his palm with her fingertip. Anyone looking on, even Lazarus was probably getting the wrong idea. There she was, smiling dreamily and playing with his hand as they stood in the dark together.

“No, you don’t know what to do. But you wish you did, you’d keep trying if you thought anything at all was really possible.” Birdy turned her eyes to look up at his as if she were weighing his honesty and earnestness. “… as human as any of us.” Us. The hope was there. It was a small thing, a tiny flame to be kindled. She snorted and slapped the palm of his hand sharply before releasing it. Birdy didn’t let go of him though, she reclaimed his arm quickly and started to take another step before the swing and sway of emotions had her teary eyed and looking even more foolish than she already did.

“We have to find the perfect place first. Somewhere it won’t feel cornered when we pull it through. Well not that the whole thing will feel cornered but thinning the gauntlet between worlds is always tricky. We’ll have to put up the proper words of course. I might have to get an extra hand or two… hmm.” She pondered. That would be tricky, if she could manage the whole thing on her own, she should. But still even bouncing the idea off of Jen might not hurt. “And of course, you’ll help me talk it down. Seeing you might be enough to get it to be more communicative. I haven’t tried to confront it directly…. The boar didn't think that was a good idea.” Birdy was rambling at that point, the plan was already formulating in her head.
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Lazarus Fenwick
 Posted: May 20 2014, 02:59 PM
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Tremere Eccentric
40, Kindred

N/A


Lazarus just held very still, expecting something, expecting the worst as his hands were run over by the woman. He had a good eye for things like that, and honestly when ti came to the fairer sex- he tended to gain their ire quickly and without mercy. So when he found himself scolded and slapped over the palms he simply froze in place wincing as though he probably deserved that. Perhaps not he intended reaction but it was what it was...

He pulled his hand away and rubbed them on the seat of his pants muttering. "For now." Which seemed to be the point that she was missing. But by this point he was getting a bit snitty, because she could say human as much as she wanted- but as of now she hadn't seen the beast that lurked just below his skin which he fought hard to keep back, even now he was struggling because it wanted to lash out for such violence placed upon him. But Lazarus was stubborn and he choked down that monstrous instinct with a heavy gulp

"You mean other mages? That isn't exactly a good idea...most won't be as open minded as you are." He couldn't think of member of the consulate that wouldn't have him put to death, well...maybe Farraday, but he didn't really care about anything which wasn't exactly an advantage. "I think we've figured out I can't exactly talk sense into anything though so there's that." His eyes rolled upwards for a moment there, as his arms crossed over his chest. "Hmm.." That was a vileness in attitude he knew wasn't coming from himself, and he reached into his pocket and handed over a card. "Here is my card, it has my cell...it's getting late and I really must be going home...if you figure anything out or believe I can help...please, contact me." A peace offering, but he really had to be going, if not for his sake, then for hers.
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